The Last Thing That Made Me Laugh Out Loud: A graphic of two chocolate Easter bunnies facing one another. The first bunny had a bite taken out of his tail and a caption that said: “My butt hurts.” The second had a bite taken out of his ears and a caption that said: “What?” p.s. Maybe you have to see it. Seriously—it’s hilarious.

Best or Worst Lie I’ve Ever Told: I stole a Cadbury egg from Gemco, our local grocery store, when I was seven. That’s lying right? I was totally curious to find out if the Cadbury commercial was true. Did the inside of the chocolate egg really have an egg white and a yoke? How did they DO that? How did they get the yellow liquid to stay inside the white liquid, and how did they get those liquids into the chocolate shell in the first place? This blew my mind. Mom wasn’t buying. The egg or the argument for the egg. But I needed to know. And so I took an egg, unwrapped it, and—in a complete panic, worried that I’d be caught shoplifting—I shoved the whole thing into my mouth, thus completely preventing the dissection necessary to answer any of these questions.

The Best Or Worst Lie I’ve Ever Told: “No, it’s me. Really, it isn’t you, at all.”

Body Art: a couple (small) tattoos. An ellipses, an e. The e doesn’t stand for ecstasy or anything having to do with the Internet.

The Sports I Play, And The Sports I Watch: Play: Ms. Pac-Man. Watch: Boxing. Both, I notice now, rather violent.

In My Bedroom, You Will Find: Everything I own. (Greenwich Village, Manhattan). Or: Everything I own that’s not in my living room or kitchen. (Greenpoint, Brooklyn). Or: My bed. (Not borough- or neighborhood-specific).

Tip Of The Iceberg: Melted. Email Me If: You’re interested.

Message Me If: You want.